For Thursday, September 11, 1997 Drummer Column, Gibbs, 722 words

Too many doors

Our son, Adam, has been home all summer from his freshman year at college. He has refilled our empty nest. He will be returning to UC Santa Cruz in a couple of weeks, emptying it again.

It was a rough go for a while. He wasn't sure he wanted to return to college, just yet. He'd spent his freshman year wracking his brains trying to chose a major, but was unsuccessful. He came home in June ambivalent about the direction of his life.

He wasn't completely happy with major he'd chosen last September, either: Latin, with a minor in Italian. He enjoyed studying the languages, but was no longer optimistic about the career opportunities. He spent the summer working at the video store and wondering what to do.

To add to his career confusion, he was also suffering from wanderlust.

For a while he wanted to live and study in Italy, to see if he could master the language in its natural setting. Santa Cruz offers a study-abroad program, but one must first finish one's sophomore year. Adam wanted to go right away.

A week later he decided he wanted to live at home until spring, saving his money, and then travel to Europe on vacation - rather than working and studying over there.

He then heard about the Monterey Institute of International Studies. They offer intensive language programs coupled with international skills - diplomacy, business, politics. We drove down and visited the campus and Ravi Shankar. Not THE Ravi Shankar, of course. The other guy. The breathing expert.

After that trip he wanted to vacation in Russia, then return and attend MIIS to become a transition specialist. I'm not sure that's the official title, but here's what he'd do: He would become an expert on Russian culture and daily routine. Then he would hire himself out as a consultant to companies who transfer American families to Russia for extended work assignments. He would meet with these families and teach them how to shop, how to pay utility bills, how to recreate, and the like.

However, MIIS requires one finish one's sophomore year at another college before transferring in. Again, Adam couldn't wait.

A few days later he received some brochures he'd ordered, on working in England. It was a job placement service. Here was something he could do right away. He filled out all the forms and was ready to mail them in, ready to pack his backs.

Then he started thinking about money. After two months of earning minimum wage, at one of the most profitable businesses in town, he'd been unable to save much money. He'd been living at home without rent, without grocery bills, and was still short in the pockets.

What would it be like in jolly old England? He would have to dip into his dwindling college funds just to fly there and set himself up in an apartment. He never licked the stamp.

On our side, as parents, we, too, felt some ambivalence. We didn't want to spend thousands in tuition for him to pursue a career he wouldn't follow. We were willing to give him a year off to find himself. We empathized with his wanderlust, but couldn't afford to foot the bills of a world traveler. Food, shelter, and four-years of tuition is the extent of our commitment.

To reiterate: We empathize. If a young person wants extended free time, it's hard to find it after college. After college one must leap directly into job-search mode, and once the job is landed, it's even harder, if not impossible, to enjoy an era of extended free time before retirement - unless, of course, one becomes a teacher.

We advised him to seek solace in the twelve glorious summer vacations he's had so far. We advised him to make his own decisions.

Then he drove up to the foothills to visit his old pal, Greg Luna, who is studying to become a master chef at Columbia College near Sonora. Greg just got back from an extended stay in Paris where he studied French cuisine.

After that weekend Adam returned home and said, "Gee, I'd forgotten how much fun it was to be on a college campus. I want to go back to Santa Cruz."

So, off he goes. He will major in languages; of that, he is sure.