Drummer Column, Gibbs, 710 words

Incoming!

One evening a meeting was held at the newly-constructed Mendicante Trailer Park in Beverly Hills. People gathered in the Emmett Kelly Memorial Housing Hall, a tin edifice overlooking Sunset Boulevard, to discuss their suit against the government for what they considered an unfair crack-down on residents' cars that could not meet pollution standards. To date, 26 cars had failed smog inspections, leaving owners to either give up their vehicles or pay expensive tune-up fees, which many could not afford.

Their push was to enact a Fair Low-Income Vehicle law that would permit limited-income Americans to drive uninspected, unmaintained, low-Blue-Book vehicles on our nation's highways, without the threat of discrimination.

The movement was growing in size. Representatives from all over the state were there. Six members from Cote Towers, a studio-apartment complex in Black Hawk, arrived wearing T-shirts that read "We Refuse to Hitchhike Across the Bridge to the 21st Century."

A faction of 15 that called itself the Right to Roost Foundation from Kioski Village in Sausalito drove down in a panel van and brought their 68 pets. They were fighting their own battle against local pet licensing fees which they claimed to be exorbitant. They wanted discounts for people with five or more pets, and a complete exemption for families who kept entire litters. Their concern was that they could not afford to pay both pet and vehicle fees without affecting the nutritional health of their children.

Three big guys from Shanto Domingo in Ferndale drove down on their Harleys, without helmets, wearing shirts that said, "Wallets Against Helmets." They wanted an amendment to the suit that either repealed the helmet law or provided state-subsidized affordable helmets to the disadvantaged.

The Calistoga Coalition from Bantam Towers was there, 20 strong. The CCFBT was a major player in the SmogGate Movement. They had recently won a battle to provide city-subsidized cable for all television owners earning minimum wage. They got HBO thrown in because its lack of commercials kept many households from being enticed by advertising to purchase items they didn't need.

Also there was Marjorie Chardan from Rio Vista. She wanted a boat, but couldn't afford one.

Not everyone could fit inside the Kelly Conference Hall, so some guy named Ed, who knew a little about electricity, knocked a hole in the wall and spliced in an outdoor plug that he'd removed from the kitchen of a place he'd once rented in Palm Springs. Being called ingenious by his friends, after not finding any electrical wire, Ed used speaker wire from his son's Boom Box to create the 120 outlet. Now, by using four power strips plugged together, he was able to hook up seven televisions and four speaker systems for the people outside.

The meeting opened with guest speaker Harry Hastings, who had recently earned the right to fly First Class at Coach fare on any airline, based on the claim that occupying air space is an unalienable right not to be infringed upon by curtains and extended leg room, and because he had gout. As a result of his struggle, which went all the way to the Supreme Court, all airlines must now provide six First Class seats at Coach rate to anyone down on their luck.

"My friends," he began. "We are all Americans, and we deserve all that America has to offer. Economic Discrimination in this country must end. We are not to blame for inflation. It is the work of the government and big business. Why should we pay the same prices as the wealthy for goods and services that were created for all Americans? I say we don't stop with vehicle inspections. I say we expand our struggle to get discounted rates on all public transit, at the gates of all amusement parks, and through the doors of all furniture and appliance stores. Why should we suffer, why should we be excluded, simply because we do not have the price of admission? From each according to his abilities, and to each according to his needs. Those are principles worth fighting for."

One woman in the back raised her hand. It was Marjorie. She said, "I want a boat, a big one with dual inboard motors and red sail."

The crowd cheered wildly.